Now, most people might ask, "Why recreate 94 and 95 and not Giant-Sized X-Men #1?" Well, the answer is pretty simple. Most of the giant-sized issue was Professor X travelling the globe to find these new X-Men to go and rescue the original X-Men from the living island of Krakoa. The action in that book is an afterthought; a plot device used to bring the new team together and have their personalities clash with the original X-Men.
The X-Men comic had been in a sales slump for a long time, and most of the issues leading up to this were just reprints of earlier X-Men comics. It was time for a shake-up to the formula, and that's just what guys like Chris Claremont and Dave Cockrum would do. This new team was made up of adults from around the globe. These were not teens that Professor X could teach and mold; these were fully-formed and, in many cases, damaged adults.
These are the first two issues after Giant-Sized #1, which I was fortunate enough to have as a kid thanks to the Classic X-Men series that came out at a perfect time for me. That series reprinted the X-Men book from Giant-Sized onward, and I have probably the first 25 issues or so. So while I was picking up Uncanny X-Men in the midst of the Mutant Massacre, I was simultaneously reading their origins. It would probably be confusing if I tried to do that as an adult, but as a child I would eat up all the X-Men I could get.
The Comic Book
"The Doomsmith Scenario!"
Writers Chris Claremont, Len Wein
Pencilers Dave Cockrum
Inkers Bob McLeod
Colourists Phil Rachelson
Letterers Tom Orzechowski
Editors Len Wein
"Warhunt!"
Writers Chris Claremont, Len Wein
Pencilers Dave Cockrum
Inkers Sam Grainger
Colourists Petra Goldberg
Letterers Karen Mantlo
Editors Marv Wolfman
The first issue begins with Professor X congratulating his new X-Men on a job well done. The celebratory mood is cut short by Sunfire, who declares that he agreed only to help the Professor once, and not to join the X-Men. The Professor asks the rest of the new students if they will stay, and they agree to. The original X-Men, however, tell Xavier that they are leaving. Logan tells them to leave and spare everyone the soap opera. He has obviously not been an X-Man long.
The original X-Men leave without Cyclops, who declares that this is where he belongs. You know, for at least another 40 issues or so. Cyclops shows the new X-Men around the mansion, including the Danger Room. Thunderbird tries to show off how tough he is and gets injured by a laser. Embarrassed, he starts arguing with Cyclops until the giant floating head of Professor X's telepathic projection breaks them up.
Just then, at the NORAD base located in the Rockies, one of the government employees gets a package. Upon opening it, he finds a metal box with a button that says "push me". Since this is one of the most secure locations in the United States, the guy presses the hell out of that button. Lo and behold, a portal appears!
The Ani-men quickly overcome the security forces in NORAD, who are apparently as powerful as they are smart. It is only then that the mastermind behind this plot emerges. Count Nefaria!
Turns out that he has transformed normal people into these Ani-men using "Maggia science"! I don't know about you, but if a guy wanted to give me powers using "mafia science", I probably wouldn't get into that windowless van. Anyway, Nefaria uses the base defenses to gas the rest of the staff. With all the opposition out of the way, he broadcasts to the government that he is holding the base for ransom. If he isn't paid, he will unleash all the missiles contained in the mountain!
The Air Force forwarded this message to The Avengers and Beast (who was a member of the Avengers at the time) was kind enough to forward it to Professor X, since the Avengers are unavailable to help. With that, Professor X sends the new team of X-Men who have only known each other for a day and have only had one team training session to stop Nefaria. Solid plan, Chuck, solid plan.
As they approach the mountain, General Fredericks contacts them to inform them of the "Doomsmith System", which is apparently a countdown system that will launch all the missiles ever and can't be shut down after a certain point. Apparently, the Air Force decided that super villains shouldn't have all the fun naming death machines, and created a few of their own. I also have a hard time believing that the same people that actually push a button labeled "push me" on something they received in the mail actually have the intelligence to create a system like this, but that's neither here nor there. Nefaria fires missiles at the approaching Blackbird, and the X-Men are forced to eject!
The next issue opens with the X-Men trying to figure out how survive the landing. It's a good excuse to show off the powers of the new team and have them display some teamwork. Once on terra firma, Cyclops sends Nightcrawler to scout around. Nightcrawler immediately gets ambushed by Croaker (Frog-Man), but beats the living crap out of the poor dude because...seriously, Frog-Man.
Nightcrawler lets the rest of the X-Men into the base, and the proceed to look for the rest of the Ani-Men. They are attacked by soldiers that Dragonfly has hypnotized, but Storm makes quick work of them with a flash flood. Soon after, they find the Ani-Men and all hell breaks loose.
The X-Men nearly get overwhelmed by the Ani-Men, which I'm pretty sure is the most embarrassing thing I can imagine.
Fortunately, they are able to pull it together and remember that these are probably the lamest villains of all time.
Banshee and Thunderbird got knocked out cold during the fight, and Cyclops says that they will have to leave them there. He's such a good leader, even back in 1975. They soon find the Doomsmith System...but it's too late!
Banshee and Thunderbird wake up just in time to see Nefaria trying to escape in a jet. Thunderbird isn't having any of that. He leaps onto the jet as it takes off, and rides it into the air. He begins pounding on the canopy, trying to get to Nefaria.
Meanwhile, Cyclops and Co. desperately try to disarm the Doomsmith until the floating head of Professor X tells them that they already stopped it by basically trashing the entire base during their fight with the Ani-Men. Outside, Banshee keeps screaming at him to get off the jet, because he actually has powers that could take it down without blowing himself up. Unfortunately, Thunderbird just screams "YOLO!" and this happens:
Winner: No One
The Battle
For the map on this one, I just needed a high-tech looking indoor map. The Danger Room map from the Wolverine & The X-Men fit the bill as far as I was concerned. The primary feature of this map is the elevated control center in the bottom of the middle of the map, and a fair mix of elevated, blocking and hindering terrain littered around the rest of it.
As for the combatants, the X-Men were quite easy to choose. I tried to choose each one in a rookie form and at a low enough points cost that this wouldn't end up being a 1,000 point battle. After all, I had to figure out what the hell I was going to put together for the Ani-Men! I ended up with a garbage Wolverine, and the only Thunderbird we have is also king of the trash pile. The Cyclops and Storm I used are only slightly better, but the rest of the X-Men are solid newer pieces. The total ended up being a 477 point X-Men theme team.
mu002 R Cyclops
Team: X-Men
Range: 8
Points: 50
Keywords: Mutant, X-Men
(Speed) Concussive Blast: When Cyclops makes a ranged combat attack and deals damage to an opposing character, the character is knocked back equal to the damage dealt.
ui002 E Wolverine
Team: X-Men
Range: 0
Points: 41
Keywords: Martial Artist, X-Men
m10a007 E Storm
Team: X-Men
Range: 8
Points: 59
Keywords: Deity, Morlocks, Ruler, X-Men
(Special) Battlefield Promotion: Storm: When Storm hits one or more opposing characters, after actions resolve, place a Promotion Token on her character card. You may then roll a d6 that can't be rerolled and add 1 for each Promotion Token on her character card; on a result of 8 or higher, you may replace this character with M10A #020 Storm on the same click number.
dofp009 R Nightcrawler
Team: X-Men
Range: 0
Points: 80
Keywords: Excalibur, Martial Artist, X-Men
(Special) Teleporter: Nightcrawler can use Combat Reflexes and Energy Shield/Deflection.
(Speed) Burst of Flame and Stench of Brimstone: Nightcrawler can use Phasing/Teleport. When he does, he can use the Carry ability and, if he moves 6 squares or less, after actions resolve he may make a close combat attack as a free action.
(Damage) Everywhere at Once: Once per attack, if Nightcrawler is attacked, he can use Probability Control. This power can't be countered or ignored.
dofp003r R Colossus
Team: X-Men
Range: 0
Points: 100
Keywords: Armor, X-Men
(Special) Unstoppable!: Colossus can use Super Strength. At the beginning of your turn, Colossus can use Sidestep.
dp051 V Banshee
Team: Police|X-Men
Range: 8
Points: 98
Keywords: Generation X, Horsemen of Apocalypse, Police, X-Corps, X-Men
(Improved) Echolocation: Improved Targeting: Ignores Elevated Terrain, Ignores Hindering Terrain
(Special) Sibling Immunity: Banshee ignores all damage dealt by characters named Black Tom Cassidy unless it's dealt by a close combat attack. This ability can't be ignored.
(Special) It's Going to Get a Little Loud: Opposing characters within 6 squares can't use Super Senses. Opposing characters within 6 squares can't use Impervious, Invincible, or Invulnerability but can use Toughness instead. When Banshee hits a character that can't use a power due to this trait, increase damage dealt to that character by 1.
(Attack) Sonic Scream: Banshee can use Pulse Wave. When he does, if you give him a double power action instead he can use Improved Targeting: Ignores Blocking Terrain. When a ranged combat attack resolves, any blocking terrain along its line of fire to the target is destroyed.
aw019 R Thunderbird
Team: X-Men
Range: 0
Points: 47
Keywords: Mutant, Soldier, X-Men
Now the Ani-Men. Oh, those classic and beloved Ani-Men that appeared maybe once or twice after this. They will never be clixed. Ever. I'm calling it right now. It was up to me to dig through my collection and see who I could proxy in to fill the roles of these ill-fated animal men (and woman).
For Nefaria, I chose to use Killian from the Iron Man 3 set. At this point in comics continuity, Nefaria is just a normal dude with "Maggia science", so I had to find a decent normal dude to lead this motley crew. Killian fit the bill nicely. For Bird-Man I chose to use Angel, for obvious reasons; Ape-Man got proxied by Gorilla-Man from the Hammer of Thor set, Cat-Man got represented by Sabretooth, Dragonfly became Sauron because he can fly and use mind-control, and Frog-Man became Ant-Man. Yes, Ant-Man. I looked everywhere for a Frog Man from a Spider-Man set, but it turns out he doesn't exist in clix yet, which is a shocker. If it makes you feel better, I gave him the Frog Legs feat. The total came to 479 points.
gx040 E Sabretooth
Team: Brotherhood of Mutants
Range: 0
Points: 93
Keywords: Animal, Brotherhood of Mutants, Marauders, Weapon X
(Attack) Mortal Wound: When a character takes 3 or more damage from Sabretooth's attack, that character can't heal for the rest of the game even if this power is countered or lost.
(Defense) Animalistic: Sabretooth can use Combat Reflexes and Super Senses.
dofp005 R Angel
Team: Defenders|X-Men
Range: 0
Points: 74
Keywords: Celebrity, Champions, Defenders, X-Factor, X-Men
(Special) A Team Player Since the Beginning: Adjacent friendly characters with the Defenders or X-Men team ability can use both the Defenders and X-Men team abilities.
(Attack) Winged Warrior: Angel can use Charge. When he does, he can use "Improved Movement: Ignores Characters" and modifies his speed value by +2.
ha029 V Gorilla-Man
Team: No Affiliation
Range: 6
Points: 61
Keywords: Agents of Atlas, Animal, S.H.I.E.L.D.
cw015 R Ant-Man
Team: Avengers
Range: 0
Points: 75
Keywords: Avengers, Scientist
(Special) Morph: Hank Pym: Give Ant-Man a move or close combat action that deals no pushing damage. After the action resolves, replace him with any character with this trait on the same click number.
(Special) Pym Particles, Shrink: Once per game, give Ant-Man a free action to choose a friendly character of 75 points or less with the Avengers keyword. That character possesses "Tiny Size" as long as this Ant-Man is on the map.
(Attack) Ant-Swarm: Ant-Man can use Poison. When he does, opposing characters that occupy hindering terrain are dealt 2 damage instead.
wxm029 E Sauron
Team: No Affiliation
Range: 4
Points: 98
Keywords: Animal, Monster, Savage Land
(Special) Vampiric Drain: Sauron begins the game on click #3. Sauron can use Steal Energy with close or ranged combat attacks and when he does, he may heal past his starting line. If Sauron heals from an attack targeting a character with the Brotherhood of Mutants or X-Men keyword or team ability, modify his defense value by +1 until your next turn.
im3103 V Killian
Team: Hydra
Range: 0
Points: 75
Keywords: A.I.M., Celebrity, Scientist
(Special) Hiding in Plain Sight: Killian can use Stealth. Adjacent friendly characters can use the Sharpshooter ability and ignore hindering terrain for line of fire purposes.
(Attack) Your Tech is the Past, Extremis is the Future: Killian can use Incapacitate with a range value of 4, but may only target characters with the Armor keyword. Damage dealt to opposing characters with the Armor keyword by friendly characters can't be reduced below 1.
(Damage) Brilliant Extremis Architect: Killian can use Leadership and Perplex. Killian can use Enhancement but may only modify the damage value of a lower point character with whom he shares a keyword.
Starting Locations:
Nightcrawler - I2
Thunderbird - H2
Storm - G2
Wolverine - F2
Cyclops - E2
Banshee - D2
Colossus - C2
Sabretooth - I23
Angel - H23
Gorilla-Man - G23
Ant-Man - F23
Sauron - D23
Killian - C23
The X-Men win the roll off due to their theme team bonus. Nightcrawler carries Thunderbird, ending up at L11 and L12 respectively. Storm carries Wolverine to B9 dropping Wolvie off in some hindering terrain at C9. Colossus moves to B11 to back them up. Banshee carries Cyclops, landing at G8 and dropping Cyke off at H9.
Angel carries Sabretooth, landing at K16 to drop Sabretooth off at L15, then sidestepping to K18. Gorilla-Man carries Ant-Man to D17, dropping Ant-Man off at C17. Sauron carries Killian to E18, dropping Killian at D18.
Colossus starts the next turn by sidestepping to B13. Wolverine moves to another piece of hindering terrain in C15. Cyclops uses Running Shot, moving to H13 and taking a shot at Sauron, rolling a 13, which misses. Thunderbird charges to M14, attacking Sabretooth with a heavy object. He rolls a 16 and misses. Nightcrawler uses Theme Team Probability Control to try and reroll it. Thunderbird rolls a 16 again. Nightcrawler takes a push damage. Sigh. Colossus charges to B16 and attacks Ant-Man, rolling a 14, which misses. Nooooot good luck in these opening attacks. Banshee and Storm clear.
Ant-Man poisons Colossus for 1 damage. Sabretooth attacks Thunderbird, rolling an 18, which hits. His 3 damage is reduced to 2, thanks to Thunderbird's toughness. Ant-Man attacks Colossus and rolls a 22(!) which hits. 1 damage to Colossus. It's at this point that I realize that Killian is devastating to Colossus. He will always take at least 1 damage if he is hit. Yikes. Angel, Sauron, and Gorilla-Man clear.
Colossus tries to sidestep towards Killian, but fails his breakaway roll. Storm moves to G11. Wolverine uses the X-Men Team Ability to heal Colossus of 1 damage, and rolls a 1 which causes him to take 1 damage. He then takes 1 push damage on top of that. Banshee uses Running Shot to move to G14 and attacks Angel, who could not use his Super Senses to evade the attack. Fortunately for him, he doesn't need to because Banshee rolls a 15, which misses. Cyclops uses a Theme Team Probability Control to reroll it, and Angel rolls a 14, which misses again. Cyclops takes a push damage. Thunderbird and Nightcrawler clear.
Ant-Man poisons Colossus again for 1 damage. Sabretooth attacks Thunderbird and hits with doubles for 3 damage, which knocks poor Thunderbird into a wall and KO's him. Sauron tries to steal energy at random from Banshee, rolling an 18, which hits. Banshee fails his Super Senses roll and it's here that I made a mistake. I rolled for Blade Claws and Fangs on a ranged attack and rolled a one. I didn't notice this until this write-up, but I apologize for the error. Banshee took 1 damage and Sauron healed one click. Gorilla-Man moves to B18. Angel charges to L12 and attacks Nightcrawler, rolling a hit with a 19. Nightcrawler uses his "Everywhere at Once" ability to force a reroll, and Angel rolls a 19 again. Nightcrawler takes 3 damage. Ant-Man clears.
Colossus attempts to Sidestep again, failing his breakaway roll again. Nightcrawler flurries on Angel, rolling a miss with 14, followed by an 18, which causes Angel to take 3 damage since Precision Strike prevents him from using Super Senses. Colossus, Banshee, Storm, Cyclops and Wolverine clear.
Ant-Man poisons Colossus again, and Gorilla-Man attempts to shoot him, rolling a miss with a 14. Gorilla-Man takes a push damage. Ant-Man attacks Colossus, hitting with a 15. Colossus takes 1 damage, and is KO'd. Awful. Just awful. Angel flurries on Nightcrawler and rolls an 18 and a 12, both of which miss. Angel takes a push damage. Sabretooth and Sauron clear.
Wolverine moves to A18. Banshee uses Running Shot to move to M17 and attacks Sabretooth, rolling a miss with a 14. Storm uses Ranged Combat Expert for +2 damage to attack Angel, hitting on a 20. Angel is KO'd. Nightcrawler moves to M14, not taking push damage now thanks to Willpower. Cyclops uses Energy Explosion on Sauron failing on a 16.
Killian Perplexes Sauron's Attack, and Sauron charges to H14 hitting Cyclops with a 22 for 4 damage. Ouch. It's here that I might have made another mistake and forgot to heal Sauron due to his Steal Energy trait. Apparently I just had it out for poor Sauron :( Killian moves to B17. Sabretooth attacks Nightcrawler, hitting with a 20. Nightcrawler forces him to reroll and he rolls a 17, which misses. I love Nightcrawler. Gorilla-Man and Ant-Man clear.
Wolverine attacks Killian and misses with a 15, taking a push damage for his trouble. Nightcrawler, Banshee, Storm, and Cyclops clear.
Killian perplexes Gorilla-Man's damage and Gorilla-Man attacks Wolverine, hitting for 3 damage with a roll of 15. Wolverine is KO'd. Ant-Man moves to H15. Sabretooth attacks Nightcrawler and hits with a 19. You know the drill, he probability controls the attack, causing Sabretooth to miss with a 15. Sauron clears.
Nightcrawler flurries Sabretooth, failing both rolls and making me very sad. Banshee running shots to L18, shooting Sabretooth and hitting with a 17. The attack does 3 damage that Sabretooth can't evade. Cyclops manages to break away from Sauron and runs to M13. Storm uses Ranged Combat Expert to increase both attack and damage by 1, zapping Sauron (who failed his Shape Change roll) with a roll of 17. Her 4 damage is reduced to 3 thanks to Sauron's toughness.
Sauron moves to G12, getting close to Storm since she has Stealth and has been sitting in hindering for quite some time. Ant-Man, Killian, Gorilla-Man and Sabretooth clear.
Nightcrawler flurries Sabretooth again, failing both rolls AGAIN. Cyclops tries to Theme Team Probability Control one and it manages to hit with a 19, doing 3 damage to Sabretooth. Unfortunately, the TTPC causes Cyclops to take a push damage, which KO's him. Banshee uses Pulse Wave hitting Sabretooth with a roll of 18. The 3 damage KO's Sabretooth, and Banshee takes a push damage. Storm clears.
Killian perplexes Gorilla-Man's movement, and then Killian moves to G17. Gorilla-Man moves to I15. Ant-Man moves to H12, getting into base contact with storm. His special poison ability will cause her to have a seriously bad day. Sauron clears.
Storm breaks away with a roll of 6, and moves to M13. Nightcrawler and Banshee clear.
Sauron moves to L12. Killian perplexes Gorilla-Man's defense. Ant-Man, Gorilla-Man and Killian clear.
Nightcrawler moves to G18, next to Killian. Banshee ranged attacks Killian, hitting him with a roll of 19 for 3 damage. Storm clears.
Killian uses Close Combat Expert to increase his damage by 2. Unfortunately, he fails to hit Nightcrawler, rolling a 15. Gorilla-Man shoots at Banshee, failing with a roll of 16. Ant-Man moves to H17. Sauron clears, though this picture still shows an action token. Trust me, he cleared.
Nightcrawler flurries Ant-Man, failing one roll with a 16 and hitting the second with 17. Ant-Man takes 3 damage. Storm punches Sauron in the face (beak?), hitting with a 19 and dealing 2 damage, reduced from 3 due to toughness. Banshee clears.
Ant-Man punches Nightcrawler, failing with a 16. He takes a push damage. Killian uses Close Combat Expert to punch Nightcrawler with +2 damage, hitting with a 21. Nightcrawler forces him to reroll, missing him with a 15. Killian takes a push damage as well. Sauron punches back at Storm, but misses with a 15. Gorilla-Man shoots Banshee, hitting with a 20. Unfortunately for Gorilla-Man, Banshee makes his Super Senses roll. Gorilla-Man takes a push damage.
Banshee uses Pulse Wave, but misses with a 14. Storm uses Theme Team Probability control, allowing Banshee to roll...another 14. Storm takes a push damage. Nightcrawler clears, as does everyone else on the opposing team.
Nightcrawler flurries Killian, missing with the first attack but critically hitting with the second, rolling Blades Claws and Fangs for the attack, he rolls a 2, which gets bumped up to 3 due to the crit. Killians Toughness takes that back down to 2, but it's enough to KO him. Banshee and Storm clear. Sauron rolls an 11, failing to hit Storm. Ant-Man poisons Nightcrawler, KOing him. Ant-Man moves to K18. Gorilla-Man shoots and misses Banshee with a 16.
Banshee Pulse Waves with a 15, hitting Ant-Man for 1 damage and missing Gorilla-Man. Banshee takes a push damage. Storm clears, as does everyone left on the opposing team.
Storm punches Sauron again, hitting with a 17 and KO'ing him. Banshee clears. Ant-Man outwits Banshee's pulse wave then attacks him, missing with a 13. Gorilla-Man also misses Banshee with a 13.
Banshee uses sidestep to try and break away, but fails. Banshee punches Ant-Man, and hits with a 21. Ant-Man fails his Super Senses and takes 3 damage, KO'ing him. Storm and Gorilla-Man both clear.
After that, Storm and Banshee converge on Gorilla-Man. Although Gorilla-Man fights valiantly, the X-Men are more than powerful enough to whittle him down through his regeneration clicks.
Result: X-Men win! (Thunderbird still dies)
This was a monstrous battle, and frankly I'm surprised I only made a couple of mistakes. I thought after those first few 1v1 games that I was ready for a brawl of this size, but man was this daunting. I'm positive that I made strategic errors, but I encourage you to tell me what you would have done in my stead.
Just some random thoughts from yours truly: I felt really bad about how I used Colossus in that one. He basically just died to poison and did literally nothing except tie up Ant-man for a few turns. I knew that Wolerine was trash, so I used him for the X-Men team ability and that was about it. I notoriously throw Cyclops into the middle of the map and get him killed every time I use him. I think it's because I reaaaaally don't like him (except in Marvel NOW, he's kind of grown on me). I did not expect Storm to survive, but she really surprised me with her effectiveness. Nightcrawler is so, so much fun to play with. I just picked Killian for theme, but he totally pulled his weight in this battle, allowing Ant-Man to kill Colossus thanks to Colossus' Armor keyword, and perplexing his teammates. The battle may have gone differently if I had not messed up the rules with Sauron those two times, but I still think the X-Men would have won.
If you made it this far, thank you so much for reading! Next week, we will have a much more manageable battle with a mere 300 points per side. Excelsior!
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